Six Proven Secrets to Writing a Trash-Proof Press Release (Part 5)
This article is by Bill Stoller who has spent two decades as one of America’s top publicists. Now, through his website, eZine and subscription newsletter, Free Publicity: The Newsletter for PR-Hungry Businesses he’s sharing — for the very first time — his secrets of scoring big publicity. You can find more articles at PublicityInsider.com.
6) Remove all “Stoppers”
A “stopper” is something that will stop a journalist in her tracks and distract her attention. Once that happens, your release is toast. The point of your press release: to present information in the least obtrusive way possible. Consider it this way: the journalist isn’t dumb — she knows full well that you’ve sent her the press release for purely commercial reasons, hoping to get publicity that will make you more money. She can live with that as long as [a] there’s something in it for her (a good story) and [b] she’s not reminded of your commercial desires too often. A “stopper” breaks the suspension of disbelief needed for this little dance to be successful. It’s the boom mike showing up in the frame of a movie — once you’ve seen it, it’s hard to convince yourself that you’re really experiencing something that happened during, say, the Middle Ages. Here are some “stoppers” to avoid:
=> Clunky language. Journalists keep their language pretty simple. Long words, compound sentences and lofty, pretentious phrases are no-no’s. Keep your sentences short. Don’t try to present more than one idea in a paragraph. Avoid words you wouldn’t use in everyday circumstances.
=> Hype and puffery. The ultimate “stopper”. Confusing press release copy with advertising copy is a pervasive problem with businesspeople. Don’t call yourself the greatest, the hottest, the coolest, the most unique or anything of the sort. If you must make a claim of superiority for your product, service or company, attribute it. Acme President Joe Blow said the X100 “has the opportunity to revolutionize the industry” is much better than The revolutionary Acme X100 is the greatest industrial advance since the Wright brothers flew at Kitty Hawk.
=> Trademark Symbols. Including TM or copyright symbols that scream, “hey, check me out! I’m a press release! I come from a business! The legal department made me include this stuff!”
The bottom line: write like a journalist, avoid the stoppers and answer the Five W’s and you’ll succeed!
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